What do you call a computer that says hello to you when you start it up?

A Dell.

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What do you call a Mathematician who is an outlaw and a liar?

an outlier downvote brigade can start now

When did the Gorillas start to picket the cookie factory?

The day they started to manufacture animal crackers!

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What do you call a laptop in the ocean?

A Dell, rolling in the deep.

Which computer sings the best?

A Dell