How are asymptotes like women?

You can get close to it, but you can't touch it

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Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What do you say to a woman with only one tooth?

Nice tooth.

How can you get hundreds of women wet all at once?

Go to a john mayer concert!

Touch Jokes More Touch Jokes

What happens when Anthony Weiner tries to shake someones hand?

They think long and hard before they touch weiner.

What goes above the water and below the water but doesn't touch the water?

An egg in a duck.