What do New York McDonald's employees and people who read Ulysses have in common?

Liberal Arts Degrees.

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What do you call it when a German hits you with a loaf of bread?

Gluten Tag And when a hippie hits you with a loaf of bread Flour power And when a lot of people do it at the same time a rye-ot

Where do you put people with ADHD?

A concentration camp

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How did Helen Keller break her hands?

Reading road signs at 30 MPH

When she read the order back to me she said, "So, you have one thick sausage, anything else?

I looked her dead in the eye and replied, "Yes, I also ordered a pizza."