What does IKEA furniture do when it's stolen?

Activates its shelf destruct sequence. I'll see myself out...

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How many NRA members does it take to stop a 6-year-old paraplegic from stealing a candy bar?

Nobody knows - they usually lose count at 800 rounds.

Who would steal an artificial leg?

Im stumped.

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What does IKEA furniture do when it's stolen?

Activates its shelf destruct sequence. I'll see myself out...

What did the sprinter with diarrhea do during the race?

He activated his bo... LOL