What does IKEA furniture do when it's stolen?

Activates its shelf destruct sequence. I'll see myself out...

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Where does He-Man keep his towel?

BY THE SHOWER OF GREYSKULL!!! I wrote this joke today. Feel free to steal it.

What did the bartender say to the girl that tried to steal a drink?

It was worth a shot.

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What does IKEA furniture do when it's stolen?

Activates its shelf destruct sequence. I'll see myself out...

What did the sprinter with diarrhea do during the race?

He activated his bo... LOL