What happens when a linguist gets sick?

Plosive diarrhea

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Why aren't you doing very well in history?

Because the teacher keeps asking about things that happened before I was born!

What happens if you cross a snowman and a vampire?

You get a frostbite.

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What happens when a linguist gets sick?

Plosive diarrhea

What did the Pilipino orphan boy say to the linguist who wanted to adopt him?

I'll tagalog!