What mysterious hair product does Lucifer use to keep himself looking good?

Arcane-gel!

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

Which hand did Henry VIII use to wipe his bottom with?

Anne Boleyn's.

Why has no one invented a device where I can move myself around from place to place while lying in a hammock?

I remember when we used to make stuff in this lazy country!

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

Why did the black man wear a tuxedo to his Vasectomy?

If he was going to be impotent he wanted to look impotent.

What's a turtle's favorite type of shoe?

Green clog. (looks almost like a turtle shell)