What's a pirate's favourite type of weaponry?

It's ARRRtillery! bonus: A pirate's favourite melee weapon? A scimitARRR

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How do you make a Swiss Roll?

Push him down a hill. BONUS: How do you make French Wine? Invade.

What weebles and wobbles but can't get up?

Grandpa having a seizure. Bonus: Statistically speaking, 1 in 5 adult men