Why did the nun call the Womens helpline?

because she was touched by Jesus.

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Nun Jokes More Nun Jokes

How does a Nun save herself from being poisoned?

Nun chucks.

What do you call a nun that is lost?

A Roamin' Catholic

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

Why was Jesus a virgin when he died?

Every time he touched a "wound" it closed.

What did Jesus say to Peter?

Hebrew

Touch Jokes More Touch Jokes

Why do Buddhists always buy 1 ply toilet paper?

Because they like to get in touch with their inner self.

How about if I put a balloon over it?

Would you touch it then " -guy who invented condoms