What did David say when the tourist tried to touch him?

Don't touch my marbles.

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What happened to Jesus when he tried to play defense on a professional Basketball player?

He got crossed.

How's the baby?

Me: He keeps trying to shove socks thru the mail slot. Wife: Aw. His socks or yours Me: Socks is the neighbor's cat..

Tourist Jokes More Tourist Jokes

What do you call a hot girl in Germany ?

Tourist

What do West Virginians call a pretty woman?

A tourist.

Touch Jokes More Touch Jokes

What actor touches every girl on set?

David Cop-a-feel

What happens when Anthony Weiner tries to shake someones hand?

They think long and hard before they touch weiner.

Marble Jokes More Marble Jokes

Why couldn't Jesus play marbles?

Because they kept falling through his hands.

What do you do with old cannon balls ?

Give them to elephants to use as marbles !

David Jokes More David Jokes

What did David say when the tourist tried to touch him?

Don't touch my marbles.

Who's on first?

David." "Cool." -Abbott and Costello's first draft