95 Jokes

How does Microsoft count to 10?

1, 2, 3, 95, 98, ME, NT, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10.

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What do you call a woman who has lost 95% of her intelligence?

Divorced.

What do you call a man who has lost 95% of his brainpower?

A widower.

How many mystery writers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two: one to get it 95% done, and the second to give it the twist at the end.