Do you know what the word 'was' was initially?

Before was was was was was is.

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Why are white people the scariest in prison?

Because you know they're guilty.

How many scientists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Answer: I don't know, I'm no scientist

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What two words result in the most marriages?

Screw it. EDIT: has a better answer lol

What did the answering machine say to the telephone?

Take my word for it.