How many South Americans does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A Brazilian.

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How many Germans do you need to screw in a lightbulb?

One. We're efficient not funny!

How many bass players does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One. Five. One.

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How many psychiatrists does it... ...take to change a light bulb?

0, the light bulb has to want to change itself.

How many IT people does it take to change a light bulb?

Do you have a ticket for that?