What are your best family friendly Christmas jokes?

I need some for tonight.

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Christmas Jokes More Christmas Jokes

What do orphans get at Christmas?

Lonely.

What happened in China on Christmas?

The Rice-child was born.

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

Why did I need to bring a shovel on my first date?

Clearly the chloroform wasn't enough.

Why haven't they sent a woman to the moon?

It doesn't need cleaning

Tonight Jokes More Tonight Jokes

Where are you and Mom going tonight?

Me: To meet with your teacher. 7: Oh, you don't need to. I already saw her today.

What did the plate say to the mug?

Food's on me tonight.