What did the plate say to the mug?

Food's on me tonight.

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Plate Jokes More Plate Jokes

Why should you serve Eggs Benedict on shiny metal dishes?

Because there's no plate like chrome for the Hollandaise.

What's the difference between a woman and a plate?

You can't lick a woman dry. Rimshot*

Tonight Jokes More Tonight Jokes

What are you watching tonight?

The game where players make enough money to risk getting brain damage, or the debate where the players already have brain damage?

What is the most mysterious cheese?

I'm going to a cheese and wine party tonight and the host has requested I bring a "mystery cheese". I'm hoping there's a puntastic cheese out there somewhere that may fit the bill!

Food Jokes More Food Jokes

What does Pikachu say when he puts too much salsa on his food?

PIKA PIKA PIKA (Credit to my 5 year old son)

Who's there? Orange. Orange who?

Orange you glad I painfully waited until I was done cooking your food to take a poop?

Mug Jokes More Mug Jokes

What does Samuel Jackson say when he is mugging you?

What's in your wallet?

What is a conservative?

A: A liberal who's been mugged.