What did the peanut say to his wife before he left?

I'll be back in a jiffy

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What did Mr. Freeze do with his wife on their first date?

Netflix and chill.

How is your job and your wife different?

I don't mind telling work the other jobs I've done

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

Why does Beyonce sing the song "to the left"?

Because black people have no rights...

What Happens when the Cubs win the World Series?

They Leave a Trail of Tears

Peanut Jokes More Peanut Jokes

Why did the peanut go to jail?

He was a-roasted peanut.

Why did the Russians use peanuts for torture in the Cold War?

Because in Soviet Russia, Nut Cracks You!