What did the peanut say to his wife before he left?

I'll be back in a jiffy

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What did the sniper say to his wife when he came back from work?

I missed you

How many women have you slept with wife asked husband, "How many women have you slept with?

he proudly replied, "Only you, Darling. With all the others I was awake."

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

What is the fastest way to lose pounds?

Leave EU.

Why did Adele leave the house?

So she could say Hello from the outside.

Peanut Jokes More Peanut Jokes

What did the elephant say to the naked guy?

That thing sure is cute, but can it pick up peanuts?

Why did the peanut go to jail?

He was a-roasted peanut.