What do you call someone who takes things literally?

A kleptomaniac!

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Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

What do you get when you cross a dyslexic, an atheist, an insomniac?

A person that lays awake late at night and ponders if there's such a thing as a dog.

What's the last thing that goes through a fly's mind when it hits a car windscreen?

Its arse.

Kleptomaniac Jokes More Kleptomaniac Jokes

Why can't you tell puns to a kleptomaniac?

because they take everything literally (p.s. you can steal this joke if you want)

Why don't kleptomaniacs get jokes?

Because they take everything literally.