What does a Pirate say when he turns 80?

Ayyyeeeee mmmaattteeeyyy.

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Why do handicapped people wear shoes?

Because if they didn't their local gas station would turn a blind eye.

What should you do if you see your TV floating?

Turn on the lights and shoot the black guy.

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Why do pirates like TIG welding so much?

Because they have a good supply of ARRgon.

What do you call a pirate with two legs, two arms and two eyes?

Noob.

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What did the Frenchman say after 80?

Blaze it.

Why does the Brotherhood of Steel from Fallout hate '80s music?

Because of the synths.