What gets louder if you enter it from one end, but quieter if you enter it from the other?

A howler monkey.

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How to end world hunger ?

By letting the hungry die.

What is printed on the bottom of a bottle in Michigan?

Found on /r/linux) A: Open the other end

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Why did the alarm go off at the mansion?

Because the owner entered the correct code.

Why did the former fitter turned baker enter the lottery?

To win dough.