What is the best place for politicians?

Election posters. There they are portable, silent and easy to remove.

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How do you hide an elephant in a fridge?

You remove his slippers and open the door . You put him inside. You close the door and take the slippers away.

Why was Jesus such a bad carpenter?

He couldn't remove three nails to save his life

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What's a good place for water-skiing?

A: A sloped lake.

Where is the best place to buy computer software?

Washington C.D

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What's the difference between a bad mechanic and a politician?

With the mechanic, there's a shot something might get fixed...

What's the difference between a cat and a politician?

A cat will lie your face. A politician will lie your face.