What's the difference between a light bulb and a pregnant woman?

You can unscrew a light bulb!

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What is the difference between Jesus and a painting?

You only need a nail to hang a painting.

What's the difference between America and yogurt?

One has culture.

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How many Soviets does it take to change a light bulb?

None! In Soviet Russia, light bulb changes you!

How many nuts does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A Brazilian