What is the difference between Jesus and a painting?

You only need a nail to hang a painting.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between America and a yogurt?

After 200 years a yogurt will develop a culture.

What's the difference between a "narrative" and a "circle jerk"?

How you spell them.

Hang Jokes More Hang Jokes

Why did the scientist regret naming the organism "Fungus"?

Because after they hung out Gus was actually a pretty boring guy.

What do you call someone who spends the whole time on their phone whenever you hang out?

A phoney friend!

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

Why did Jesus quit playing hockey?

He kept getting nailed to the boards.

Why doesn't Jesus play basketball?

He got crossed up.

Nail Jokes More Nail Jokes

What do wives and shingles have in common?

if you don't nail them right, they'll end up at your neighbor's.

How do you keep a baby from crawling in circles?

nail the other hand to the floor.

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

What type of fish needs to be tuned?

Tune a fish

How much storage do you need for a mouthful of dirt?

A Terra Bite

Paint Jokes More Paint Jokes

Why did the remorseful child-molester paint his toe-nails?

He thought it would be a pedicure. sorry.

Why did the elephant paint himself with different colours?

Because he wanted to hide in the colouring box !