What sounds like a joke, but isn't funny?

an anti-joke.

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Whats the V in DVD stand for?

Cuz if it were lying down it wouldnt make any sense. (first post to reddit, made up this joke today .. be kind)

How can you tell this joke was submitted by a woman?

No, wait.

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What do you have left after you burn a French alphabet?

H Edit: I don't like explaining jokes but since the first guy didn't get I might as well: When pronounced in a French accent it sounds like ash.

What sound does a pubic hair make right before it hits the floor?

Ptui"