Why are all the archaeologists single?

Because they cant find dates

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What STD is found most commonly among lesbians?

Carpet burn

What's the stupidest animal you can find in a jungle?

A polar bear.

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Why did Jesus take three days to resurrect after dying on the cross?

Because the date wasn't nailed down.

What brings you to speed dating?

Me: I just ran out of the fancy shampoo my previous GF bought for me.

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Why is the archaeologist sad?

Because his career is in ruins.

Who is an archaeologist?

One whose career is in ruins.