Why are only 2% of blondes touch-typists?

The rest are hunt'n peckers.

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What do you call 2 doctors walking together?

Pair-o-Medics

What's with people thinking white people shoot up schools?

I'm white and I have only shot up like 2 schools.

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Which actor is resting in pieces?

Alan RIPman

Why are locksmiths in Japan cooler than the rest of the world's locksmiths?

Because in Japan they're rocksmiths.