Why don't paperclips move around a lot?

They like being stationery.

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What are the first words Jared Fogle's girlfriend said to him?

Would you like to buy some girl scout cookies, sir?"

What do you call a man who used to like tractors?

An extractor fan!

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How many dogs does it take to count 14 plates?

14, maybe 15, but only if the plates ... 'run around a lot!'

What do you call a rapper who masterbates a lot?

Lil Wayne-ker