Muscle Jokes

What muscle do Egyptian soldiers generally lose control of, shortly before major battles?

The sphinxster ....

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How was the bear able to move in order to get honey?

It had muscles.

What did the lobster do at the disco?

Pulled a muscle.

How many muscles does a chicken have in its neck?

Just enough to hold it's pecker up...

This joke may have profanity.

What did the man get for winning the muscle relaxing contest?

Atrophy!

What muscle is most responsible for lateral rotation of the neck?

The gluteus maximus

What's the similarity between your zero-exercise lifestyle and a professional weight-lifter competing in the Olympics?

They both involve muscles and they both result in a-trophy.