How can you tell when a politician is lying?

When their lips move

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Lie Jokes More Lie Jokes

How do you know a presidential candidate is lying?

Their lips are moving.

Why has no one invented a device where I can move myself around from place to place while lying in a hammock?

I remember when we used to make stuff in this lazy country!

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What do you do if your computer hums?

Tell it to change its socsks!

Why should you never mention the number 288?

Because it's two gross! (A gross is a measurement unit for "144". So 2 * 144 = 288. Or "two gross".)

Lip Jokes More Lip Jokes

How can you tell that a politician lies?

His lips are moving

How did the mobster burn his lips on a tailpipe?

He tried to blow up a police car.

Politician Jokes More Politician Jokes

How many politicians does it take to change a lightbulb ?

A: Two. One to change it and another one to change it back again.

What's the most dangerous place in Washington D.C.?

Between a politician and a news camera.