How do you get a cellist to play fortissimo?

A: Write 'pp espressivo'.

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What is the most popular sport played by raindrops and hail stones?

Diving

When is the best time to play racquet sports?

Ten-ish.

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How do you get a cellist to play fortissimo?

A: Write 'pp espressivo'.

Why did the cellist have to sell his instrument?

He was baroque.