What instrument does God play?

He plays the cello. As it says in scripture: "Our God is a cellist God."

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Play Jokes More Play Jokes

How can you tell if your stormtroopers just played paintball in their freetime again?

You can't.

What do you call kangarooo jump and play hocky?

the fam copter

God Jokes More God Jokes

What did the ancient Egyptian cheerleader chant?

THERE IS ONE GOD, HE IS THE SUN GOD! RA! RA! RA!"

How is God just like a regular man?

If you're not on your knees, he's not interested and you know what they say, abstinence makes the Church grow fondlers.

Instrument Jokes More Instrument Jokes

What do you call an instrument that gets a president impeached?

Harmonica Lewinsky.

What did the tuba say to the clarinet?

Nothing, instruments don't talk.

Cello Jokes More Cello Jokes

How does Yo-Yo Ma answer the phone?

Cello?

How does a viola greet a relative?

Cello!

Cellist Jokes More Cellist Jokes

How do you get a cellist to play fortissimo?

A: Write 'pp espressivo'.

Why did the cellist have to sell his instrument?

He was baroque.

Scripture Jokes More Scripture Jokes

What do you call scriptures for blind people?

The holy braille

What instrument does God play?

He plays the cello. As it says in scripture: "Our God is a cellist God."