How do you get a retard to leave you alone?

Give him a small $1 million loan

Why did the T-Rex's girlfriend leave him?

Because he said he only loved her this much (hold out t-rex like arms) Sorry this one requires a bit of a visual, but I thought you guys might like it

What did the pulse say to the legume as he left?

Lentil next time.

Retard Jokes More Retard Jokes

Whats the difference between a retard and a woman?

The retard doesn't need to be buggered to think he's special.

What do you call a football team full of retards?

Special teams.