How many egocentrics does it take to change a light-bulb?

Me, and only me!

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How many Mexicans are needed to change a light bulb?

Juan.

Why did the pirate have to change wenches?

His old one wouldn't let him swab her poop deck.

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How many black people are needed to change a light bulb?

One less now, because the one who tried to steal the light bulb was shot by the cops.

How many bad joke tellers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One.