How's the ventriloquism going?

ME: Not good. WIFE: But I got you that Ventriloquism For Dummies book. ME: I don't think he read it.

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Why did Frosty the Snowman want a divorce?

Because he thought his wife was a flake.

What's the most dangerous weapon your wife can get her hands on?

Your credit card.

Think Jokes More Think Jokes

What did Descartes say while shopping online?

I think therefore I Amazon

What do you call it again where you think of a tweet while you're offline so you have to say it out loud?

Conversation

Read Jokes More Read Jokes

What limitations does braille have? Can it represent everything that we read using the alphabet?

Very limited fonts.

Why does Helen Keller wear tight jeans?

So people can read her lips.