What did the pints say upon landing on Planet Metric?

Take us to your liter."

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Land Jokes More Land Jokes

What happens when you sing a country music song backwards?

You get your wife, truck, and land back.

Why did the Native American curse the snow?

Because it was white and on his land!

Pint Jokes More Pint Jokes

What's the craic?

2: Not much, Brian. I had a pint yesterday. 1: Oh! Really I thought you were only 15 2: I am! 1: So what was it Guiness 2: No, it was water.

What did the Irishman text his Wife?

Honey I'm down at the pub having a pint with the lads. Be home in about 30 min. If I'm not back by then please read this message again."

Liter Jokes More Liter Jokes

What did the aliens say, when they came to earth in search of soda pop?

Take me to your liter!

Why did the monster drink ten liters of antifreeze?

So that he didn't have to buy a winter coat.