What do Stephan Harper and pennies have in common?

They're both useless in Canada.

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Penny Jokes More Penny Jokes

What lands as often on its tail as it does its head?

A penny.

Why is Abraham Lincoln on the Penny?

Because it makes cents (sense).

Canada Jokes More Canada Jokes

Why can't Canada win wars?

Because they'll blow you up and then apologize.

How many people from Quebec does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One: He holds the bulb and the rest of Canada revolves around him.