What do you call a dictionary that smokes weed?

High definition

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What do you call a Pokemon who is trying to quit smoking?

Vaporeon

What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?

Slow down, and possibly use a lubricant

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What happens when a midget smokes weed?

He gets medium.

Why do Zelda and Link smoke weed?

Because they live in the kingdom where the hyrule.