What do you call an Asian guy that always shows up before he needs to?

Earl Lee

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What's the difference between a fruit and a vegetable?

A fruit doesn't need a wheelchair

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Google Fiber Note: Randomly came up with this joke today

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What do you call an "Asian" that loves using moisturizer?

Laotian.

What did the Asian pirate do when he saw a crowd?

He fry through it!

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What do you call an Asian guy who is a member of ISIS?

RICE-IS

What do you call a hairpiece on an Asian guy?

an Oriental Rug.