What does Harry Potter say when he wants a cigarette?

Tobaccio

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Why don't you want to hang out with a dude from Chicago?

Because 'Illinois you!

Why didn't Harry Potter want to date Hermione?

Because he likes to Hit it and Quidditch

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How does the author of harry potter descend a mountain?

On foot, how else? JK Rowling

Why couldn't the pregnent women watch all of the Harry Potter movies?

Because they lactate.

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How do you know when a cat's done cleaning itself?

It's smoking a cigarette.

Which came first the chicken or the egg?

The one smoking the cigarette.