What pen company did Lance Armstrong buy?

Uniball

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How do you sell a chicken to someone who is hard of hearing?

HEY! DO YOU WANT TO BUY A CHICKEN!?!?!

How do Vampires buy pants if they can't look in a mirror?

Now, I tweet them

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Why is Lance Armstrong a good citizen?

Because he is always recycling

What pen company did Lance Armstrong buy?

Uniball