What's a procrastinator's favorite punchline?

I'll tell you tomorrow

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How can you tell when a Software Developer is an extrovert ?

He looks at shoes when he's talking to you.

What is the difference between a English actuary and a Sicilian actuary?

An English actuary can tell you how many people are going to die next year. A Sicilian actuary can give you their names...

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How do you save a suicidal procrastinator?

Tell them it can probably wait 'til tomorrow.

How do you leave a bunch of idiots in suspense?

I'll tell you guys tomorrow