What's Red and crawls up your leg?

A Homesick Abortion.

This joke may have profanity.

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Leg Jokes More Leg Jokes

What do you call a pirate with two legs, two arms and two eyes?

Noob.

What do you call a Scottish man with no arms and no legs?

a bell.

Crawl Jokes More Crawl Jokes

How'd you sleep?

Him: *texts* Horrible...I was tossing and turn- Me: *crawls out from under his bed* I KNOW, YOU POOR THING.

How would you order a Subway footlong in metric countries where they don't have feet?

By crawling to the counter " GET OUT