It's an aunt- -him.
Thinking you are following someone.
Soba noodles!
Nothing. It's a gift she will always remember. Edit: Wording clarified (Thanks to therinnovator).
Not enough cement EDIT: Okay thanks for pointing out that I messed up the wording but the joke is supposed to be the funny part
Uncles
I don't know but that reminds me of a similar joke my uncle used to tell...