What type of doctor prescribes Coke and 7-up for a living?

A Poptometrist!

Why is Santa Claus so jolly?

He knows where all the naughty girls live. I actually heard this in the video game LA Noire. Thought it was pretty funny so I bust it out every Christmas.

What's the best part of living in Alabama?

You don't live in Mississippi.

Coke Jokes More Coke Jokes

What is brown and sticky?

Michael J Fox opening a can of coke

What is the captain of the starship enterprise's favorite drink?

Picardi and coke

Type Jokes More Type Jokes

What type of tree doesn't remove active torrents?

A tree.

How many words can you type a minute?

ME: Probably all of them BOSS: What do you mean ME: Well, like for example, pickle