Whats black and isn't working?

Black lives matter.

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Hows your headache?

Husband: She's fine.

Whats the difference between a chicken and an alligator?

I don't know.

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How many Democrats does it take to change a light bulb?

It only takes one, but we weren't able to get the work done in 1 term because we inherited a really bad situation from the prior administration.

Why did the people's phones stop working on the plane's that crashed into the twin towers?

They were in airplane mode. (I'm so sorry)

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What do you do for a living?

The engineer replies " I make chips" "Oh yummy!"

Why don't fairies live under toadstools?

Because there's not mushroom!