Why can't you trust 8?

cause she's a two-timin' four.

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Why should you never trust advice from a group of gryphons?

Half of them are lyin'.

How much do I trust reddit?

I went on before seeing the new Star Wars.

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How do we know hamburgers have high IQ's?

They 'loin' fast!

Why does it take longer to get from 1st to 2nd base, than it does to get from 2nd to 3rd base?

Because there’s a Shortstop in between!