Why couldn't they show the orchestra concert on TV?

There was too much sax and violins.

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Tv Jokes More Tv Jokes

Where is the English Channel?

Student: I don't know, my tv doesn't pick it up

Where were you?

Uh, with my.. gf " Gf Well, tell us about her! What's her name commercial on tv uh.. Lisa.. Brandnewtoyota

Violin Jokes More Violin Jokes

What do you call a horse that plays the violin?

Fiddler on the hoof!

How can you tell if a violin is out of tune?

A: The bow is moving.

Sax Jokes More Sax Jokes

What is the difference between a lawnmower and a soprano sax?

A: You can tune the lawnmower and the owner's neighbors don't mind if you don't return the sax when you borrow it.

Why did the bear start playing music when the priest tried to absolve him of his sins?

Because the priest said "Bear, atone" and the bear thought he said "baritone" as in "play the baritone sax now". The bear immediately started wailing away on the sax, rocking back and forth so hard he knocked over all the prayer candles and almost snapped his own spine. All the priest could do was ask the lord for the strength needed to get this bear into heaven.