Why did the Earth suddenly enter a manic episode then go back to a depressive episode?

Because it's bipolar.

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Why did the Earth suddenly enter a manic episode then go back to a depressive episode?

Because it's bipolar.

What on Earth happened?

The doctor said, surprised. "I don't know, it started with a boil on my arse." the frog said.

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Why shouldn't you enter into a contract with Wolverine?

Because of his retractable clause.

What do you call a duck traveling south that enters a time warp and meets itself traveling north?

A pair of ducks.