Why do bad break-dancers get reduced prison sentences?

Time served

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What did the handyman do... when he got his girlfriend in bed with him for the first time?

He screwed, nutted, and bolted.

Why did the kleptomaniac spend so much time in Bed Bath and Beyond?

He was taking a sheet.

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What did the patriarchy serve at their dinner party?

Traditional gender rolls.

What do you call a pink slip served in a coffee bag?

Grounds for termination!

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Why did Mexico reduce the number of days an American tourist can stay in their country from 180 days to 90 days ?

Because after 90 days in Mexico, even they try to enter the US illegally.

How do you reduce wind-drag on a musician's car?

Take the Domino's Pizza sign off the roof