Why does OP never deliver?

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Why did OP get fired from his job as a mailman?

He never delivered.

What's the difference between a radish and a beet?

I've never radished off to OP's mom.

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How do you disappoint a pack of redditors?

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Why does OP never deliver?

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Why would OP make a terrible pizza chain?

Because they don't deliver.

Why do woman make terrible truck drivers?

Because you give them one good load and it takes them nine months to deliver.