Why doesn't anyone watch women's hockey?

The games take 3 months to play!

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Why couldn't Cinderella play football very well?

Her coach was a pumpkin

Why is Tigger always dirty?

Because he plays with Pooh

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Why's the couch smell like pee?

Flashback to me watching The Ring alone Me: *points at son* I think someone had another "accident."

Why shouldn't you wear a watch on your belt?

It'd be a waste of time.

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How do you know when someone's read the Game of Thrones books?

Don't worry, they'll tell you.

What do they call the Hunger Games in Ethiopia?

Games.

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Why doesn't anyone watch women's hockey?

The games take 3 months to play!

Where are the raisins today?

A student used to give his teacher some raisins everyday. He kept giving them for 3 months straight. Then one day he did not give raisins to his teacher. And his teacher asked him "Where are the raisins today?", and the boy said "My rabbit died."