Why is it so hard to explain metaphors to a kleptomaniac?

Because they always take things... Literally

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Kleptomaniac Jokes More Kleptomaniac Jokes

Why can't you tell puns to a kleptomaniac?

because they take everything literally (p.s. you can steal this joke if you want)

What do you call a kleptomaniac who doesn't understand figurative speech?

Someone who takes everything literally

Metaphor Jokes More Metaphor Jokes

What's a metaphor?

Winning the game tournament!

Why is it so hard to explain metaphors to a kleptomaniac?

Because they always take things... Literally